Tuning people out

I have had to do this ALOT recently. I won't go into detail about one situation, but I will fill you in on tonights adventure. I finally joined the workout facility our community has. I thought I could keep up the running, but my frozen ears wouldn't let me.

So, I go to work out tonight after Kaiden goes down for bed, kitchen is somewhat clean, work is done, and while my energy level is still somewhere about 49%. When I arrive, I am the only one upstairs on the cardio equipment. So, I turn on whatever trashy show is on mtv because the only other channels are hispanic or home shopping, and I begin my 30 minute adventure.

Then, I hear footsteps. I never try to make eye contact with the people coming up the stairs because its just akward. There isn't just one girl who has maybe 110 lbs on her, but two. You know the kind that make you want to puke or throw a steak and pan of brownies at them. Here I am, rocking my maternity bra still, and in walks two barbie dolls. I have spit up on my black shirt (very visible) and half my hair is falling out of my pony tail.

The best part is that they decide the best place to run is RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME...I'm guessing just so I can drool over their "I haven't had a baby body". As we are watching the MTV show with all the Italian people who are too loud, I hear one of them say, I haven't worked out in a week, I feel like such a fat slob. I bet I have gained a pound.

I honestly stopped running and moved and this point.

I am very proud of myself and not ashamed to say that I gained 55 pounds with Kaiden.....and he was and is totally worth all 55!!! Within the first week after I delivered I lost 20 and since then have lost 15 more. Last week, I lost 7.....not so sure how that happened, but would love to step on the scale Sunday night and see 7 more pounds gone. Don't think that will be the case, but there is always hope!

addict

I have an addiction.....

hot baths.
If I do not take one EVERY night I cannot sleep....I cannot relax. This addiction came about when I was about 4 months pregnant. People said not to take hot baths but I couldn't help it. Kaiden came out just fine, so I'm pretty sure I could have just gotten in the hot tub every night too. It has gotten to the point where I fall asleep in the bath and can sometimes stay an hour in there. Maybe this is why my skin is cracking.

blogging

My attempts to cutesy up my blog have been unsuccessfull. All I really want is a cute background, but my limited technology skills have stopped me. I have tried Lacey's suggestion but its not letting me save the template.....anyone???

1st time all over again

Before I start, let me say that the blog will get better. I need my friend Cari's help to figure out how to make it all fancy and stuff:) This is my first run at this so bare with me!

Today I had to go back to work.....again. I felt as if I was leaving Kaiden at the sitters for the first time. Now, I will say I couldn't ask for a better person to watch Kaiden (well besides Granna:)) Lori is the sweetest person I know. She has the most tender voice and the kids there just love her. Kaiden stays at the sitter with his friend Jonas (whos dad works with me and who's mom works with Brandon) and three other little boys who are 3 years old. Lori says that Kaiden just loves to sit and watch the kids play and would all day if he didn't have to sleep. When I dropped him off this morning he was sleeping and I just wanted to bend down and grab him and run out the door with him. This wasn't near as bad as the first time I went back to work. I literally could not sleep the night before. I layed in bed wondering if I could actually make myself get up in the morning. When I fed him I cried, because he looks into my eyes so intensely, and I didn't want him to do that with someone else. When we played I cried, because I didn't want him smiling at someone else when they did something funny. I cried when I changed his diapers because I didn't want him peeing on someone else:) It was the ugly face kind of crying....

It was honestly the worst feeling of my entire life. But, looking back, I think how silly I was because Miss Lori is AMAZING!! He actually did teetee on her the first time she changed his diaper and she just had to email me at school and let me know. It's so nice to be able to run over at lunch (she is only two blocks from my school) or at conference to checkup on him. She also sends emails to let me know how he is doing everyday.

Over the Christmas break we saw lots of family and even made an 11 hour road trip to Brandon's family in Nebraska. Kaiden did SOOOO good in the car. Despite it taking us three days to get up there because of the snow, he slept the entire way home, minus the one time he wanted to be fed!!

Kaiden has grown SO much. He will be three months old on January 11 and it just amazes me how different he is since he was born. I remember thinking, "Is this kid ever going to wake up, all he does is sleep!" Now he laughs all the time, rolls over, kicks, stands up, and finally LOVES taking a bath!! We have gotten to the point where he can be layed in his crib and he falls asleep on his own. We are also to the point of him sleeping through the night!! I was just telling someone today how nice it is to actually get sleep at night now. I can remember when he was waking up every two hours and I didn't know how I was going to make it. I couldn't wait till the weekends when my parents came so I could get some sleep, or the afternoons when his daddy got home so I could at least go brush my teeth! No one ever prepares you for how exhausting it is going to be, but on the other hand, no one ever prepares you for how amazing the feeling is when they smile at you:)

I could go on for hours, but my hot bath is calling me!